That’s My Story…
and I’m Sticking To It!
WHAT
story are you telling yourself, about yourself, right Now? A happy one I hope. Or maybe it’s a sad one, or grumpy, or angry or… who were those other 3 dwarfs again?
AND,
what story are you telling The World about yourself?
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The average daydream is about fourteen seconds long and we have about two thousand of them per day. In other words, we spend about half of our waking hours — one-third of our lives on earth — spinning fantasies.
– Jonathan Gottschall
‘The Storytelling Animal:
How Stories Make Us Human’
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Which Story Do YOU Most Often TELL?
Story 1. Ghost of Years Past:
” The Way it Was”
Is your favourite tale, the ‘same-old-same-old’, your friends and family {and therapists?} are all sick to death of hearing. All retch and no vomit. He–said|She said, …and then they…, and do you believe what they did to me next…OMG it was awful, just awful... you have no idea… I’ve never been the same since… I cried for days, and days…. and days…….. and months……………. and………………………………………. years …and ……….. etc. etc.
{hey listen – not meaning to sound insensitive here – I’ve been there myself and know and appreciate an understanding ear — just making a point with this (exaggerated?) example is all}
or,
maybe it’s
that stand-by, family favourite,
Story 2. Ghost of Years To Come:
The – “He, She, It, Me, I, They, Everyone, Everthing | The: Economy, System, Government, Country, World ~ deep Breath ~ is Such a Mess That There is no Hope and We’ re All Gonna’ DIE! Can’t You Hear Me People? …We’re All Gonna’ DIE!!” – story.
Aka:
The Doom & Gloom, Fearful Future, Batten Down the Hatches, Here it Comes, Ready or Not … and we’re definitely NOT!! story
~ I think I’m in need of a short rest already…| and we’ve barely begun ~
3 hours later
Okay, I think I’ve regrouped – let’s continue
WELL,
There is HOPE everyone. Because there is a 3rd choice available. Perhaps not as dramatic(ally fun?) as the first 2 options – maybe even a little boring in comparison – and also a bit more effort in terms of emotional control, {but never mind, I have utmost confidence in most of 😉 you}.
Story 3. No Ghosts:
“HERE I AM ~NOW ~”
I am here, now ..
This is what I am seeing, now
This is what I hear now
This is what I smell …now
This is what I am touching …now
This is what I taste…now
This is what I am thinking… now!
And – often / usually, most importantly – this is what I am FEELING NOW!
=
Lose your mind and come to your senses ~ F. Perls
~ or ~
Lose your old STORY and come to your senses ~ F. Perls + TME
~ And then ~
Rewrite / Retell your very own Real-time STORY
Thus aligning yourself up with your Timeless, Real Desired-Self Story
and living happily-ever-after!
sort of
🙂
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Everybody’s life story is potentially a book to be written, read and learned from. We all have histories – and thus stories – that are unique and individual to us alone. This is true. And, it’s not.
Q: How is it not? A: Well, we can easily get lost in the COMPLEXITIES of our stories
ooohhh, I can hear the feathers ruffling as I type ~ gentle readers {please be gentle}
Reminder: I am still waiting for that letter re: political correctness I requested a while back in my HELP! Post* / August 20, 2015
Often we believe we are the only ones {or are a [sm., med. or lrg.] group of ‘only-ones’} to have had the experience and reaction we alone have been through.
The thing is, {IMHO} we are all much more similar than different in our humanity and our response to different (but emotionally similar) experiences.
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Is that ruffling growing louder?
Dear Reader, I do want to acknowledge there are dramatic extremes in terms of human experience going on in the world ~ AND ~ this modest post is ill equipped to address them here. TME’s therapeutic interest is in strategies for keeping our own personal lives and corner of the yard in order.
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We all experience loss. Most of us with a capital L. Our losses fall within the range of money, health, family, friends, lovers, work/career and relationships in general. Did I miss anything?
And, once again {IMHO} I think it’s more important for us as human beings, trying to share this beautiful clump of dirt, to connect emotionally 1st rather than via our personal or collective stories 1st. Our emotions are something we pretty much all have in common. Our stories, however, are all over the map (literally + figuratively) and can often seem confusing to one another. That is where the COMPLEXITY lays/lies? — actually, I think both spellings might apply in this case?
Not that connecting emotionally isn’t without it’s complexities also
The challenge and risk here is ….
Can you guess?
Yup, you guessed it…
~more likely you skipped ahead and peeked ~
V U L N E R A B I L I T Y
Emotional vulnerability is something most of us avoid at all cost; waaayy too scary! We teach how to create and tell stories in school but we have a way to go perhaps in teaching emotional communication.
Our stories give us the illusion of some kind of safety
[they keep us engaged and distracted in the ongoing good-bad, right-wrong, black & white dialogues that seldom reach any satisfying resolution]
Whereas our common emotions can cut to the chase, get to the heart of most matters and help us Feel Connected to one another…aahhh, Now doesn’t that Feel better 🙂
and one more thing, while I’m on this rant!
Just bear with me…
Who would I be without my story ?? How would I define, explain, justify, compare and sell myself to you and the world — never mind control, manipulate, overlord, enslave and…
{am I getting melodramatic? Please tell me – don’t let me go on and embarrass myself} Alright, apologies, I’ll put a sock in it. After all, this is supposed to be somewhat fun & entertaining — not angst ridden.
| OMGosh, have I just inadvertently, revealed my own default,
unconscious STORY telling mode!?
oh well, never mind- I have my therapy appointment tomorrow
***
🙂
NOW, let’s get to it and (RE)write that story of mine …