| I’m sure you all remember R # 1: Resistance
from my 1st post in this ~3 Steps~ series on : UNPROCRASTINATION
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| And surely you will remember R # 2: Repetition from my last post: UNPROCRASTINATION | Part 2
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| And you must all certainly have been waiting with bated breath for this follow up 3rd, and final, instalment: R # 3 To UNPROCRASTINATION:
Receiving
Let’s start with a recap of the previous 2 posts before we have a closer look at Receiving
1. Resistance | Procrastination: when we avoid and try to ignore activities that are often good & healthy for us because they evoke the same negative Thoughts|Beliefs|FEELINGS that we experienced some time in childhood or even more recently.
We began the 3 Steps process with a look at possible origins and beginnings of procrastination in our lives.
~ A scary or upsetting event, situation or trauma {probably early on | but could be something more recent too} was left unresolved / unprocessed / unfinished.
~ Our age-appropriate response at saying NO! to this negative experience was the beginning of an emotional Resistance; and likely the beginning of our Procrastination.
~ In our naive/unskilled attempts at resolving the fear & hurt from that experience {which was still wanting to be soothed, released and fully dissipated & finished} we repeatedly projected our unfinished emotional needs, inappropriately/haphazardly, onto ‘similar’ situations
~ one of these situations [for me it was piles-of-paper] becomes habitually associated with the repeated, negative emotional response = PROCRASTINATION
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2. Repetition | Practice: I find that if I can s l o w my thinking<>feeling<>action process down and {B R E A T H E} and choose to respond in the direction of happiness, well-being and ease, the more I end up getting what I want {like UNPROCRASTINATION} — as opposed to the same-old-same-old crap (like procrastination).
What Not To Do | Don’t Resist Resistance ~ Don’t Resist Procrastination / What You Resist Persists ~ Do not be hard on yourself~ Do not try too hard
“Trying is Lying” ~ Do not talk about your problems
What To Do |~BREATHE~ Practice|Like building muscle > not done in 1 trip to the gym
~ Thoughts. It’s important what we think. Be intentional ~ choose your + thought >> *NOW*<<
~ Feelings| Feeling good is it’s own reward | Love is it’s own reward |
Feeling good is the ultimate manifestation
From feeling good <> good things flow>>>UNPROCRASTINATION
~ Rome wasn’t built in a day… We’re not trying to go from 0 – 100 m/p/h in 5 seconds .. It doesn’t have to be done all at once… One brick at a time…blah, blah, blah
~ Do it NOW! It really is your only choice — Resistance to resistance is futile.
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3. Receiving
{now comes the tricky part — for me at least — if any of you guys out there have any tips I’d sure like to hear ’em}
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A man’s reach should exceed his grasp,
– Robert Browning
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Receive Why?
~ Because you want it. It’s important to YOU. PERIOD.
~ Because it will make you Feel better.
Receive What?
~ Whatever the hell you want! Because you want it. PERIOD.
~ usually what you want falls under the broad category of Relief of some kind. You want to Feel better | less anxious or less afraid for example. Some ease, letting go, relaxation, comfort, Aaaahhh…..
*Note: as long as you’re respectful of others boundaries and not encroaching on them in any way
Receive How?
~ By any means possible. Because you want it. PERIOD.
~ You can KNOW you are Receiving by how you Feel.
~ You can Feel your way to UNPROCRASTINATION {much more Fun & Satisfying than Doing your way there}. For example: you probably believe you will Feel better when the task is done – and using your imagination to visualize and Feel the desired outcome is excellent >> Practice more of that 🙂
*Note: as long as you’re respectful of others boundaries and not encroaching on them in any way
Receive When?
~ Whenever you want it. [Maybe NOW would be awesome?] Because you want it. NOW, PERIOD.
~ The timing is up too you. Ask yourself, “Does this Feel timely for me? Am I Feeling that this is a good time for me to welcome this Wanted thing into my life? When in my future do I Feel would be the best time to create/manifest this?
*Note: as long as you’re respectful of others boundaries and not encroaching on them in any way
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Okay, Okay…I’m doin’ ok…I’m handling this demanding/expectation stuff okay. My Breathing’s still good, not grimacing or cringing inside — actually feeling pretty good. Shall we continue 🙂
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If I tackle procrastination / my piles-of-paper (or any other problem) head-on I am immediately up against my resistance and I find myself pushing, trying too hard and not at all getting much satisfaction from the task — sigh. This is when I’m in my head ‘should-ing’ myself. Not fun.
As I said in my previous post – there can be many different approaches to problems like procrastination.
Q: Which approach is right for you?
A: The one that RESONATES with you the most.
Q. How do you know which one Resonates with you the most?
A: By How You Feel,
…your Feelings are what are in Resonance with what is Best for you. Your thoughts, ideas, theories, speculations past experiences, memories and reactions may all be useful enough {or a hindrance} along the way, and they are not the deciding factors,
This is your emotional intelligence coming into play.
Feeling {yay!}, rather than Doing (yuck), is HOW to first open yourself to RECEIVING
FEELING 1st | ACTION 2nd >>> leads to >>> UNPROCRASTINATION*
*Of course there are, more often than not, exceptions to most strategies created to promote well-being & balance; including this one.
{TME is not infallible after all…or so I’ve been told}.
When working with depression for example, one might want to start with taking small action steps 1st, and checking in with how they feel 2nd, to note if there is any improvement.
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| Certainly, when it’s beneficial and appropriate do take action, make plans, set goals, practice, research, network etc. Just make sure you are aligned with your Feeling Self as well – this is where your Inspiration & natural [not forced] motivation usually originates.
Q: How can I tell the difference between Inspiration and motivation?
A: Inspiration: In-spire / Breathe-in = coming from inside you, usually your heart or gut [not your head / thoughts]
~ Most easily detected when you are quiet, still, calm, meditative, contemplative, inwardly focused
Motivation: Generally, something often instigated from an outward source. For example – what others expect or want(ed) from you, ‘shoulds’, guilt, thinking that others-know-best / not trusting yourself
~ Letting your head & thoughts outweigh your heart & gut in your decision making process.
~ and…there can also be positive outer motivating influences to draw from. It’s not simplistically one or the other, or black & white. We can be guided by a mix of both towards a given goal. We’re best to find our own balance between the two — and that takes attention and practice.
Q: How do you know when to take action?
A: When you Feel in Resonance/Aligned with your Inspired action it’s most likely beneficial
{any further required motivation will then naturally, effortlessly fall into place}
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Tricks & Tips
To Getting Into RECEIVING Mode
Tip # 1.: this all takes practice. So go easy on yourself
~ Play. Don’t work at it
~ Have fun with it. If it stops being fun, stop doing it and go do something else/ that is fun!
Or take a nap.
If you can, come back to it at a later time when you are Rested and have fresh Perspective.
Tip # 2: Earlier I mentioned how most of us already can visualise and imagine the results of UNPROCRASTINATION and how that would Feel.
On the heels of that is … Act as If.
Feel 1st what the Wanted experience/outcome would be like and then Act 2nd.
Fake it ’till you Make it
Fake It = Feeling it 1st
while
Make it = Taking Action 2nd
Our conscious choice to create Feeling via our imaginary power is an invaluable, if not necessary, tool we can use to put us into a state of Receiving which naturally, happily Inspires us to move beyond procrastination into UNPROCRASTINATION
IMAGINE>>FEEL=RECEIVE {INWARD MANIFESTATION}>>INSPIRATION | MOTIVATION>>ACTION>>RECEIVE {OUTWARD MANIFESTATION}
Recognizing the need for sound PLANS and IDEAS for the attainment of my desires, I will develop my imagination by calling upon it daily for help in the formation of my plans. ~ Bruce Lee
Reminder: this takes practice ~ play with it ~ have fun ~ experiment ~no rush ~ explore at your own pace ~ chill ~ you can’t ‘do’ it wrong ~ you will eventually make-it-your-own / own it … and that will Feel AWESOME!
Resistance ~ Repetition ~ Receive
‘Nuff said. ~ Stan Lee
Too much said. ~TME
see, I can let my inner critic have a voice too — it’s all good! 🙂